Today I felt terribly bad, I was disappointed. Things became worse when I realized that I was disappointed with myself.
The consequence of doing something is being criticized. At first, I thought I was disappointed with people who didn't appreciate me much. Then, I questioned myself "do I need approval? Or do I need appreciation?" But actually, that is not the point. The point is I was disappointed with myself, because I cannot please everybody.
I always said the same things over and over again to others, "you cannot please everybody." But I was being reminded about the same thing today. I cannot please everybody, I cannot fulfill people's expectations. Even when I give my best, it is not enough and it will never be. It was frustrating to think about how to please everybody, because in fact it was rather impossible. Now, let me think twice if it is right to have a people-pleasing behavior.
The first question is "why I need to please everybody?" I couldnt find the answer, maybe...just because I dont need to! I am not capable of it, even I cannot always please people I love the most. The truth is we will always get disappointment from anybody, maybe from our friends, best friends, family, spouse, or ourselves. But it is in human nature to please somebody, at least that's what I feel. So, who I need to please? Who I choose to please? Some people may choose to please their parents, some other try to please their spouse, and there are any who want to please their community. But, who I need to please?
I was reminded by this way, that the only one I need to please is God. I had chosen to give this saved life to Him, although actually this life isnt mine anymore. Every morning I said the same things in my prayers, today I realized that I never really mean it before. Saying those is a habit. Now, I want to mean it, really mean it from my deepest heart.
I want to consciously choose to please Him as my one and only. Maybe my trials and efforts are not enough, He just wants me to leave it to Him.The moral road of trying harder and harder is not enough this way. This time, I leave it all to Him. I want to do what He wants me to do and to be.
2 Corinthians 12:9
"and He said to me, "My grace is enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." So then, I will boast most gladly about my weakness, so that the power of Christ may reside in me."
I believe when we please God and become who He wants us to be, we will not only please Him, He will make us a living grace for our communities. Do not make it the target, it is the side effect. Focus on Him and He will give it all to you.
By posting these, I really hope you will think again about your people-pleasing behavior (just like what I did), especially if you feel intimidated by it. You may reach on different conclusion than this post, it may not be wrong. Please pray about it, He knows what is best for you.
Have a rest on Him and on your pillow, happy wednesday!